Oxygen: Live Out Loud

14 contenders? REALLY RYAN MURPHY?! WHYYYY! That means two more people I have to compete against and two more weeks I have to stay in the competition. Grrrrrrrr. But when everyone first got to the house I wasn’t even thinking about the competition yet. I was so excited to see the amazing people that I had met at callbacks and I just wanted to see my bed because I was SO tired! Then when Robert came in and gave us “Born this Way” as our first homework assignment and I was like, “Alright Lil… time to put yo’ self together!”

I literally started crying when Lea Michelle walked in the room. There were so many different emotions going through me. She is such an inspiration to me, but all I was thinking was, “THIS IS ACTUALLY MY LIFE… WHAT?!”

I think Aylin is my biggest competition at this point. She has an incredible story, a great voice and a kick ass personality. We're both loud and hilarious and I feel like we also share a similar fire. At this point I knew that my voice and my personality was what would make me stand out. I'm comfortable performing in front of people. I always have been. So I knew from the start that I needed to show my individual personality and make sure my vocal chops matched it!

The most intimidating part of this competition was that our friends and roommates were also our enemies in a way. I didn't really know who to trust. But I knew Ali and Dani had my back. I got so close to them at callbacks and they're just amazing people!

I didn't really know what to expect during choreography. I don't consider myself a dancer, I consider myself a mover. Hahaha. I'm just afraid that I'll be too musical theatre, because that is how I was trained. The recording studio was probably the most intimidating part of the whole week. I have never worked in a studio before and all of the lines were so short that I didn't know if I would be able to impress Nikki. It felt really weird being in a sound proof room, hearing myself through headphones, because I'm a LIVE singer.

I didn't know what to expect from the video shoot either. What was Eric gonna be like? Would I be too over the top in front of the camera? I felt okay about my performance but here was a lot of ground to cover in those few hours and I'm not really sure if I popped.

X Lily Mae

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